Before I was a mother I think I was quite ignorant (and maybe a little judgmental) about what it takes to have a small person with you all the time. I was like any other young professional. "Why doesn't she tell little Matthew to get down?" "Why doesn't she just tell little Suzy to be quiet?" "Hmm mm little Matthew needs a spanking." I could go on forever about how I judged parents while their kids were going crazy in Target or at a restaurant. I could even give you some recent examples.
The difference is that now I tend to question the parents behavior less and the child's behavior more. Savannah will be two in September and I think I have learned so much more about children and their behavior. I know now that when little Matthew is going ape shizz in Target it's not because he's a bad kid. Little Matthew is probably hungry, bored or in need of a good nap. Little Matthew may not be a troubled kid and his mother is probably not a push over. They're just having a bad day.
When I hear little Suzy screaming her head off at dinner I no longer assume that little Suzy is a spoiled brat. I first assume that little Suzy is teething or overtired. You know. All those "mommy" words that get tossed around when a kid is in distress. Don't worry. I use them too. After all that diagnosing, I then feel bad for little Suzy's Mom. Because like most Moms I've been there. I've had Savannah not want to sit still for dinner. Or sit at the table period. And while she's never really thrown an all out temper tantrum in public I could only imagine how irritating and exhausting it could be. I use those two words because that it's exactly how those situations are.
We all practice patience, get to-go boxes and make a dash for the nearest exit in those situations. Mothers have so much more in common than I think I would have ever imagined. Since becoming a Mom I am way more understanding about what it takes to get through the tough days. And while some kids may be little bite sized jerks sometimes, I know now that it's not always the Mom's fault. I have a new level of understanding and compassion. Has your perspective about the mother-child dynamic changed since becoming a Mom? How?